Summary: In a horrible case of parenting gone wrong, I overlooked what I assumed to be a minor injury only to discover we had a broken collarbone situation.
Lesson: Bad judgements happen, don’t beat yourself up about it.
It all started on a rainy Sunday. We had guests in town and wanted to venture out to the city, crossing our fingers the rain would subside. As the children were running down the sidewalk, Khaleesi dropped a toy, turned to pick it up, and ended up flat on her back. She was in tears, but kids fall all the time (mine especially) with nothing but a few bruises. I didn’t think anything of it, picked her up, and sat her in the stroller.
She cried all the way to the LUAS stop (tram into town). As we waited for our tram, I picked her up to console her a bit. She screamed out in pain and I knew we had something a bit more serious than a simple fall. Of course, I still figured it was no big deal, she probably twisted or strain a muscle in her neck/shoulder area. That’s what it looked like, pain when moving the neck or arm and no pain when sitting still. We checked for broken bones and couldn’t feel any.
Monday, we kept her home from school because she was couldn’t turn her head without pain. I debated whether to take her to the Dr. or not, she seemed fine as long as she didn’t move her arm too much. I have never broken a bone in my life, neither has my husband, but we both figured the pain would be so much greater if she had broken something and again, we didn’t feel any breaks. We used heat and ice and gave her medicine for the pain.
Tuesday, she seemed to be feeling better. I crafted a makeshift sling to help immobilize her arm which reduced the pain and we sent her to school. I talked with her teacher briefly to explain what happened and request she take it easy with no running outside and no P.E. until she was feeling better.
Tuesday night, I noticed she now had a bump on her collarbone. That wasn’t there before, and my mother instincts kicked into high gear. The bump was sensitive to the touch. I took to the internet, I love to research, and realized she may have a broken collarbone. Time to go get an x ray.
Wednesday morning, we went to the Swift Care. When the doctor showed us the x-ray, I could clearly see the crack in her collarbone. Luckily, it was a clean break, meaning it would heal up perfectly in no time. There isn’t much they can do for this kind of break, just keep it in a sling and try to limit movement for a week or two until it heals. Lucky for her, it only takes about 3 weeks for children her age to heal from this. The doctor told me I did the right thing making a sling, but they did upgrade us to a more stable one.
Khaleesi spent the next two weeks with the sling, she didn’t use it all the time; it was a bit big on her and as she healed, she didn’t need it as much. We went in for a two-week check-up with a clean bill of health. Now she is fully healed and its as if it never happened at all.
This is only one story where I feel like I failed as a parent. I should have seen the signs, I should have taken her immediately to the doctor, maybe I shouldn’t have moved her from the sidewalk at all. All these thoughts I allowed to enter my head and fill me with self-doubt. The truth is, I’m only human and I make mistakes. Khaleesi is fine, she is healed, and only the bump remains on her shoulder (new bone growth, should go away in a year).
Moral of this story is sometimes we make the wrong decisions when it comes to our kids. We can’t beat ourselves up about it, it happens. We do the best we can with what information we are given. Kids are so resilient and unfortunately, they get hurt a lot. We do our best to make the right choices when they do get hurt. In most case, they are up and running in a matter of minutes; minor bruises or scrapes.
I’ve never been one to go to the doctor over a little fever or a small injury, not that there is anything wrong with that. I tend to assess the situation, do a little internet research, and then give things a day or two before I bring doctors into it. This is simply part of who I am, I’m a problem solver and I want to try to solve the problem on my own first.
All of this to say, I’m not a perfect parent. Kids are clumsy and aloof, and they will fall no matter how hard we try to keep them upright. My Khaleesi is one strong, brave, tough kid. She doesn’t let much keep her down, and she never let a broken collarbone keep her down. She even won Golden Rules Super Star for being brave and working hard, even with an injury.
More Pictures of the kids: