Not for the Weak of Stomach


I have been a bit gassy lately and food seems to not be a friend of mine. I made a decision to try cleaning out my system to see if that did the trick. I talked to Kevin who informed me of a Salt-Water cleanse, which will make you poop a lot but cleans everything out. It is the least expensive and easiest procedure, and I would rather drink something than flush water up my bum (enema anyone?). Anyway, I took 2 teaspoons of unionized salt, or Kosher salt in my case (by the way it was suppose to be 2 tablespoons), put it in a small water bottle and then filled it up with warm water. Then, I drank it down, yummy…no not really. Tastes as bad as it sounds, and the trick is to keep it from coming back up. For some reason, it wasn’t difficult to drink (maybe because I didn’t have enough salt in there), so I finished it all up. Then, you wait around for about 30-60 minutes before the fun really starts. I put a scented candle in the bathroom and some magazines to read, for the fallout and then did some chores around the house while I waited. Sure enough about 50 minutes later, I felt a rumbling sensation in my intestines and actually started to get excited (I know I’m strange). I went to the bathroom and after about 10 minutes, was strangely disappointed at the lack of “stuff” coming out. I was hoping for pounds of waste to come out so that I would lose 5 pounds or something. I took a few trips to the bathroom, all with the same result. There was no huge cleansing, not big relief, I didn’t feel lighter, and in fact I gained a pound when all was said and done. I was under the impression that a Salt-water cleanse cleans out the bowels and intestines, but this was not the case with me.

I told Kevin of my disappointment and that was when I realized I did not use enough salt. Will I try it again later this week? Of course, I need an exciting tale to blog about after all. I wasn’t feeling to good most of the day anyway, due to an all-night Migraine, so after my depressing non-poop fest, I took a nap.

Kevin came home and began typing up some court documents, so I continued to sleep. Once, I got up, I decided I should try to lose weight the old fashion way…working out. I drank some water and then headed down to the gym for some treadmill action. As I was walking on the treadmill, Kevin came in and lifted some weights. Then, we decided to go in our new Sauna. I am starting to really enjoy that thing. I love that you go in and you are all cold (cause you are naked, or mostly naked) but when you come out you are drenched with sweat. Below is a picture of my sweaty, glistening Kevin as we are getting out. He tried to get my back, which just drips sweat like its running out of my body, but the camera kept fogging up in the box. It feels really good to sweat out all the toxins and stuff in your body, plus it’s the equivalent to burning about 300 calories in a 30 minute sitting.

Now, I am just praying for snow to continue falling outside, anything to get out of work really.

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